The Departed Troubles Relatives of the Real-life Boston Irish Mobster ‘s Victims

The Oscar awarded “The Departed” has recently triumphed at the star-sudden award ceremony last month, but not without causing up set for real victim’s relatives of the real Boston based mobster who terrorized so many. While the mob drama wowed moviegoers the world victim’s relatives reflect on the horrific crimes committed against their family members by the cruel mobster.

The extraordinary tale of the Irish Mobster and the Police force whose task it was to infiltrate the mob has Hollywood singing “The Departed” much praise. Director Martin Scorsese received his first in five previously nominations Oscar Award for Best Director of the critically acclaimed mob film. This Hollywood adaptation of real life Irish mob life has proven to be the highest earning film in the Scorsese filmography to date

It even saw the likes of Mark Wahlberg receive his own Oscar nomination for a superb depiction of a superior officer in the Massachusetts Police Force. The actual realty of the film is that there is a real-life Boston Irish mobster named James “Whitey” Bulger who grossly tortured his victims. The relatives of his victims are speaking out about the unpleasant and even horrifying memories “The Departed” film resonates for them.

Bulger was indicted for 19 murders, but has evaded prosecution since December 23. 1994. His disappearance was believed to be in connection with his acting as a government informer along with links to corrupt federal agents. He is listed with the likes of Osama bin Laden on the America Most Wanted. A massive manhunt has been undertaken to apprehend the fugitive who has not surfaced in several decades.

Christopher McIntyre, 47, whose brother was murdered by Bulger’s gang in 1984, said of the Bulgur characterization in the film, ” The movie gives this hero worship to this creature.” He verified that he and other relatives of Bulger’s victims were simply unable to watch the mob drama because they found it all still “very painful.” The real life fugitive mobster has scarred the relatives of his victims for life. The film version of his life has left some of these relatives with a feeling of exploitation.

“For eight hours, they strapped him in a chair and cut pieces off him. He begged for a bullet in the brain,” McIntyre said. Many are still affected by the threat and loose ends of Bulger’s gang. In 2001, McIntyre’s family filed a federal lawsuit claiming top-level FBI agents at of the Boston office knowingly shielded Bulger’s crimes from prosecuting, because they were informants against the local Italian Mafia. FBI has not responded with a comment, but did confirm that the Bulger investigation was very much on going.…

I Lost My Job, but Life Kept on Rolling

It was in the height of this recession and something should have tipped me off in the beginning to what was going to happen. My boss was behind on his credit card payments, he kept harping on about making ends meet and then when hiring someone to work on the production line he was hoping to find someone who didn’t need medical benefits. So don’t ask me why I was shocked when on that Friday at five p.m. he told me and some other employees that he had to let us go. When I was hired, my boss was looking for a minimum wage secretary, but being a seasoned veteran, I negotiated more than that amount. I offered to take less hours at a reduced rate, but he said he couldn’t afford that. So right then and there I knew I was going to be unemployed for a while.

I left the office feeling numb, it hadn’t worked it’s way into my system yet. I left to go pick up my son and called my mother to tell her what happened. When I spoke those words… it hit me like a paddle on a fraternity pledge’s rear: I was unemployed. Right then and there I started to scream in my car on my cell phone until the police pulled me over. I handed him my registration & license, still screaming on the phone. He let me go without a ticket (probably out of pity) and when I got home I began my long, arduous search.

Much to Craigslist’s credit, they have many employers who list some great jobs… but unfortunately for me, it seemed for every one authentic job I applied to, there were two spammers. I tried the Careerbuilder route, but I’m only 24. I can’t tell you how many jobs called me to thank me for my time and inform me I was their second choice behind some old dinosaur who has been in the field since before I was born. I fought hard and despite being qualified, I was passed over dozens of times for either more experienced or cheaper candidates. I finally gave in and lowered my expectations….

I took a lower paying job, with no benefits and barely over minimum wage. It was supposed to be an office manager position, but with receptionist pay. I toughed it out and paid my dues in purgatory. I’ve never appreciated the jobs I had, because they landed in my lap with ease. I wowed my bosses with my skills and quickly worked my way up in the corporate world. After this experience, I know I’ll never take a good job for granted again.

I’ve found a new, better paying job. I finally can get benefits and respectable pay…. I start work Monday. I finally get to go back and wear my business casual suits I took for granted and turn my cell phone back on. I can play a little with my budget instead of whittling everything down to the last dime. If anything, I am grateful for this experience but disappointed it had to happen this way. I am grateful I have the work experience and references I have, and feel lucky. I’m dreading the future, but can’t wait for Monday…. or the following week for my first paycheck. I guess the future isn’t that bad but from now on like most of America, I’ll always have a plan B.…

Crises of Family Life by Years

Family Time photo

The crisis of family life – a situation in the family, when no explicit reasons for deteriorating relations between husband and wife, and it seems that there is no understanding and exit. Of course, it’s hard to keep the relationship, if you do not know the person with whom you live, if all annoying, and always want to change something.

Crises of family life can be divided approximately 1,3,7,15,25,40 years of married life. But in every family there is no specific scenario of life, and focus on the number makes no sense. Therefore, try to determine the crises by events.

1 year of marriage

“Who are you? I do not know you! “- The main phrase of this crisis, which begins after the wedding or after the decision to live together.

Reasons. It’s no secret that before the wedding and after, people are a little change, relax and start being themselves.

How to cope? Sit down and think hard whether you accept the flaws of your partner? and pay attention to his dignity.

3 years of marriage

“Firstborn” – the crisis is connected with the first birth of a child in the family and called the crisis of the third year.

Reasons. Having a baby is related to emotional and physical stress for both. Wife unhappy that her husband does not help, and her husband, in turn, angry from lack of attention to his person. If between a pair of no sexual relations, resentment starts to grow into a riot.

How to cope? You should pay more attention to each other. Do not forget that you love each other, do not put all your love for a child. There are grandmothers, aunts, godmothers – give them an opportunity to pay attention to your kid. At this time, go to the movies, cafes or simply walk down the street.

7 years of marriage

“Routine” – crisis seven years relationship.

Reasons. Tired of all! Life, children, work – all in a circle. No emotional outbursts.

How to cope? You need to go on a vacation, take a trip to another country – a change of scenery. You can go to the dance as a couple or in the gym, go ice skating or rollerblading, in general, to do something that you have not already done long ago.

15 years of marriage

“Midlife Crisis” – usually occurs in those who are “about forty” – that’s about 15 years of living together.

Reasons. Comes time revaluation of values. Begin torturing questions: “Are all right in my life?” And it seems that time is running relentlessly fast and suddenly need to change something, and another chance will be gone.

How to cope? Do not be afraid to tell her husband that you appreciate it and much love. Pay attention to him, giving nice gifts and not ties for all holidays.

25 years of marriage

“Empty nest syndrome” – a crisis of parents when children leave the family. Approximately 25 years of marriage.

Reasons. Children grew up, they now have their own families. And you suddenly realize that life has lost its meaning and it seems your family except for children has long been nothing in common.

How to cope? Find a new meaning – save up for a house, buy a cottage. You have lived together for so many years, you have so much in common. Remember your dreams together and start to implement them.

40 years of marriage

Retirement – a crisis of loneliness on the forties family life.

Reasons. Retirement is waiting impatiently, and when he finally comes this long-awaited moment, the man begins to panic, not feeling fit, he does not know what to do.

How to cope? You need to find some useful hobby. Do what you want. …

Managing Life with a Large Family

I am the mother of four children. Many people have asked us why we decided to have such a large family. It appears that a family of six is considered large these days. When my grandparents were children they were all members of families with at least ten children a piece. Now that’s a large family! But these days four children feels like a lot. Why do we have four children? We’ve been asked if having a large family is a religious thing. My husband is a minister, but no, it was not a religious thing. We had four children because we did not want to have five. My ten year old son once asked me if his dad and I knew we were going to have this large family. I told him, yes, we did. I believe it is time for “the talk”.

I have also had many people ask, “How do you do it? I t must be crazy at your house with so many kids.” Well, yes it certainly can be crazy at times, but there are ways that my husband and I have found to help make it a bit less crazy having a large family. Fortunately, we did not have them all at once. Truly the poor parents who have the entire litter at once, through the miracle of fertility treatment, are the ones who suffer. We had ours spread out over seven years so the growth of our family was more gradual. We truly didn’t see much change when we went from one child to two children. He had one and I had one. The big jump came when baby number three arrived on the scene. Now we were out numbered. I had one, he had one, and then there was still one left over. We bought a big stroller. That helped.

Then the big decision to have the fourth child truly changed everything. We knew pretty soon we would both have to be on top of our game, and stay there, or there would be mutiny in this large family! We were outnumbered two to one. So how do we manage? Well, early on we knew that daycare and after school care was not an option for us. We wanted to raise our children without that outside help, and to pay for daycare for four children would be just too much money. We have had to be creative from time to time, but we have never wavered from that plan. I am in a profession that allows nighttime work so for the last nine years I have worked two nights a week to help bring in money to meet our budget. It’s not ideal, but at least our children are cared for at home by their parents. I know this is not possible for everyone, so I do feel blessed that we have been able to accomplish this. We live several hours away from grandparents, and have not been able to call on them for help with child care. That is a great option if you live close and they are willing to help out.

It is a huge task to clothe such a large family. We have had a few friends over the years that have passed down clothes for the boys to wear. That has been so wonderful. I have also been a diligent sales shopper. I wait until the absolute final markdowns for the season to buy clothes, and then pack them away until next year. I have found shoes are the hardest thing to save money on, but I do my best to try and find them on sale. I have asked the kids to try not to outgrow their shoes all at the same time. I’m kidding, of course, but it does seem to work out that way more often than not!

Feeding a large family can be challenging as well. I have tried many different strategies over the years. I have clipped coupons. I have gone to the warehouse clubs and bought in bulk. Lately, I just skip the fancy stores and drive to the plain and simple store a few more miles away. I try to buy everything for the week in that one trip. I find that you spend more money unnecessarily if you go every day or even a few times a week. I also try to have a list prepared so I know exactly what I need to buy. Taking the kids along …

When is it too Late in Life for Kids?

When should we decide to stop having kids? I believe that is one of the age old questions. Some people think you should have them young then quit. So later you can enjoy your life living it for yourself only. Others believe you should have as many as you are blessed with. There is a lot between there and don’t worry I know that but to name them all I think my computer would crash. There are so many babies having babies now or just the opposite grandmas having babies. Is there a medium?

In my own life I decided to quit early. I had a tubal ligation when I was only 21 years old. Don’t think that was an easy task though. I had to go to many different doctors and in four different cities just to find a doctor to perform it. They even went as far as giving me a month to think about it then another two weeks before the surgery itself were the doctor told me if I wanted out that was the time. But I didn’t I was sure then as I am now that I was finished having children. I had two great kids a boy and girl and that was good enough for me.

Sometimes things in our lives push us to do these things as it did in mine. My mother and a single mother at that passed away when I was only eleven years old. This was hard to understand at eleven. It wasn’t for another year till it finally sank into my head that she was not coming back. It was something I fought with my whole live mainly because I was the only one with her when she died. She was only 51 years old when she passed from a heart attach. In my view at almost 40 when she had me it was too late in her life. From the time that I started my own family I knew I wouldn’t want my kids to live that pain. Maybe it’s not rational because we all know when it is our time it is our time but sometimes you just can help how you feel.

Now on the other hand my niece that is the same age as me 30 years old has four children. From the time that she was old enough to really get the concept of babies she has always wanted six. Yet after having her fourth child her doctor informed her that if she had another baby there would be a very large percentage that it would kill her. This problem worried her because non surgical birth control did not work with her. That is when she decided to get a tubal ligation. Even now since the operation she regrets and wishes for more and says she still might reverse it and give it one more try despite the consequence.

These are only two examples I know people who have six and eight children. There children have children at the same time they were or are pregnant. They have told me that they will never take birth control and if they happen to have ten or twelve children then it was Gods gift to them. Is it safe or healthy to do this to your body? Is it a religious thing? Is it personal? I believe these choices vary from person to person or even family to family. Now that you have some more information on this I can ask you one more time. When should we decide to stop having children?…